Bologna Cake

Bologna Cake?!  It's not bologna in a cake, it's just in the shape of a cake, so wipe away those fears.  Of course if you fear bologna in any form then you may have to sleep with the lights on tonight.
Bologna Cake is a savory appetizer that you serve with buttery salty crackers, aka Ritz crackers for the fancy folks.  I had reservations as to how it would taste (I knew it would look amazing) but it is surprisingly delicious and addictive!

I am not a fan of bologna.  As a matter of fact this is the first time in my life I have ever purchased it or ate it willingly.  As a kid growing up in the south there were always boloney sandwiches wrapped in waxed paper in an old A&P brown paper grocery bag on the back seat of the car for trips to family's houses.  We didn't stop at restaurants or even fast food places to eat on the way.  Like Ron Weasley said depressingly about his packed from home corned beef sandwich "I'm all set..."  Although I do have to say I found it fun to strip the last bits of "meat" off the red plastic band from each slice with my teeth when I was younger.
As an adult I swore off ever eating any of those overly processed, non-nutritional, sodium laden (fill in black) -Roni or (fill-in-blank)-Helper crap foods.  I don't scorn my mom for feeding them to me, though.  Advertising sold them to the working mother as a quick (and cheap) easy solution for dinner, just toss in some ground beef and call it done!  I bet you could have even tossed in bologna.....Boloney-Roni!

But here we are...with a cake of bologna.  I don't recall where I first saw or heard about it.  Some sites say it's a vintage traditional dish served at church pot lucks and family reunions in the south.  I don't recall ever seeing one growing up though.  Nevertheless, it looks like it could have come straight out of a 1950-60s booklet of  "250 ways with appetizers".



Assembling the cake is super fun and then there is this great money shot of the interior once it's cut into!  Layers and layers of bologna!

Here is the recipe and How-To:

1 pack thick cut bologna

12 oz cream cheese 

1/2 packet powdered ranch mix

Aerosol "cheese" in a can

crackers

Set out cream cheese to soften and become spreadable.

Place cream cheese in a bowl, mix in 1/2 pack of ranch powder.

Place down first slice of bologna. 

With an offset metal spatula apply a thin even layer of cream cheese.

Continue this process till you reach the top.

Cover sides with cream cheese.

Decorate cake with aerosol cheese, olive slice, and some greenery!

Serve with crackers. 

(Helpful hints: I made a little foil covered cardboard disk as a base.

Make sure there is no extra moisture on each slice of bologna as you are constructing your cake. 

 Blot it off with a napkin or your cheese cream is not going to stick well.

To smooth out the cream cheese on the cake (before applying the cheese-in-a-can) , I washed off my metal spatula in hot water then dried it.  I used the retained heat against the cream cheese to polish it off, making it look velvety purdy!) 

I really thought this was going to taste like salty salt salt processed salt with salty salt crackers...but it didn't!  It really was quite tasty.  I have mentioned a few times before that I don't make many recipes more than once (except for Deep Dish Apple Pie with Candied Crust and Cranberry Coconut Holidainty) because what's the fun in that.  But!  I will definitely be making this again if the situation arises such as a pot luck or get together.
A Bologna Cake says "Now it's a party!"