Thursday, March 28, 2019

Simplicity 1962: Ice Cream Colors



I saved the "best" for last.   From the 1962 Simplicity Spring pattern fashion catalog comes this horrific piece called "Ice Cream Colors".   It's not horrific because of the clothing styles, or even the ice cream colors.  It's the photography.  My guess is the regular photographer called out dead.  As a last resort someone mentions that their 45 year old male cousin who lives in his parents basement along with his towers of "Skank Bait" amateur porn magazines is a "photographer" and he'll work for a 6 pack of Coors and a carton of Kools.



"Pssst....This is going to be outraging ladies!"



Outfit is a bit bright for me, but I kinda like the style.

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Get used to seeing this lowest common male denominator of licking the ice cream cone suggestively. Seriously this is a magazine for WOMEN who are sewers not Men who are perverts.



I like the colors shown in the photo but not the outfit style.  It makes her hips look lumpy.

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Now we even have some heavily skanked up eye makeup with the cone licking!  Classy!



The jacket for this outfit is too boxy and bulky for me.  The illustrated ladies look fine though...

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What can I say.  What are we selling here again?


I like the sash on this dress.

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This "pose" makes this woman look really ugly facially.  I know it's called "ice cream colors" and so it probably seemed like a no brainer to have the models with ice cream cones but this looks asinine.  



I like the little bow on the waist of the dress but nothing much else.  It's way too much bright pink and the dress looks uncomfortable and constrictive.

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And you probably thought you had seen the worse of it.  Nope.



Not into this outfit or the colors.  Or the model's hair.  That's not even a legitimate hair-do.  Maybe it's bed-head.

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Not licking the cone, but licking her finger.  I don't get what is with these model's facial expressions because it's neither sexy or neutral.  They look kinda snooty.  And snooty ain't gonna sell sewing patterns sister!


I like the styling of this full skirt dress and the interesting mid section.

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Now is when we see a revolt.  I am guessing Mr. Sim Plicity came down from his office to escort his daughter's girl scout troupe around and came across the whah-chicka- whah-whah music emitting from the studio.



Great neckline.

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After the "photographer" is escorted out the building by security, the models refuse to look like prostitutes on camera...unless they are going to get paid like the high dollar ones, of course!



This outfit looks great on the model but not too exciting on the pattern envelope.

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Hey look!  A pose with an ice cream cone that is actually cute and appealing.



I love this dress and the fabric print...and that little velvet bow in her hair.

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We now have kids on the set, which wasn't allowed before due to the previous "photographer" having certain restraint orders against him.



Fun styling!

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Fun color combination.  But her hips appear kinda wide.  Maybe if she had a wider belt it would off set the illusion.


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I love everything about this dress.  Great style, color, and print.  Love the big pockets.

I also love her sassy look and slightly balled up fist.
"If you ever make us model like porno skanks again...so help me I'll show you what else I can do with this ice cream cone!" 


Maybe some of you didn't think the ice cream cone licking nonsense looked suggestive...Maybe you might think I have my mind in the gutter...but I am telling you that photographer had lofty aspirations for Hustler, only I would bet he just worked at a Fotomat.

All pattern envelope source images came from various sites including: vintagepatterns.wikiaebay, and etsy

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